Friday, December 29, 2006

more nibbles vicar...

Housework reduces breast cancer full story here

So there you are ladies, stop complaining and just get on with it will you, we've got your best interest at heart when we leave our underpants lying around the bedroom floor.

My only suprise is that they found enough women who didn't do the housework to use as a test - what were their husbands thinking of ?


Alcohol blues again

Last night I had one pint can of John Smiths Smooth, just the one. I awoke at 4am with a cracking headache and couldn't get back to sleep, every time I turned over I felt dizzy, and I've got indigestion this morning - bloody alcohol intolorance has come back again and it looks like I'm back on the wagon for the foreseeable future, absolute bastard, just as I was starting to enjoy proper real ales at the pub again I've become an orange juice drinker.


Debt free at last ! full story here

No, not me, although I will be (hopefully) in a few weeks time - but the United Kingdom is due to pay the last two installments today on the money we borrowed to kick the shit out of Adolf Hitler sixty years ago.

Its good to know that WWII only cost us just under £5billion but rather alarming to learn that we haven't paid back any of the WWI loan yet, presumably because we hope that the lender has forgotten about it, or we've moved address and not told them, I fear that this will catch up with us soon and we'll find the interest and penalty charges will be horrendous for seventy years of avoidance.

I wonder which bank we've borrowed from to pay for Iraq ?


Public transport is dangerous full story here

We've got another thing to be proud of in Leeds this week - we had the most muggings on our public transport system than anywhere else in the country, so thats nice then.

One of Jodies friends was mugged whilst on a bus with two of his friends in November, the three youths who stole their phones and cash were armed with a knife and seemed keen to use it, the bus driver did fuck all about it and drove off and left the lads with no way of contacting home and no way of paying to get home, so thats fairly normal then.

Fortunately Jodies friends father is a police officer and whilst they didn't catch anyone on the night these sort of incidents usually have a list of usual suspects attached to them, i wouldn't like to be in their shoes when they do eventually get taken in for questioning at his police station, he's a dog handler and I have a sneaky feeling that the three scrotes just may have to be restrained by some of the dogs in a secluded place after they make "an escape bid"

2 comments:

Michael said...

But don't forget, you can claim these loan charges back.

Just hire Martin Lewis, he'd sort all this debt out! ;)

Gary said...

There is a whole new story brewing between me and NatWest over their manhandling of my accounts, depending on their answer on Tuesday its all going to kick off next week - stay tuned :)