Thursday, January 12, 2006

It smells a bit around here

The diet continues.

Four days in and cutting out lunch hasn't started to work yet, at least its not yet reflected on the daily weighing scales, there is time though.

Replacing lunch (we Northerners call it dinner of course but I'll revert to Lunch so as not to confuse the namby-pamby in the South) with fruit is my masterplan, so far this week I have eaten an apple, a banana and a pear for lunch washed down with a cup of coffee.

The total effect so far has only been to increase the emissions of flatulent gaseous vapours during the afternoon, and its starting to whiff a bit in the office, I blame the pears.

Which isn't what the Queen did on one state occasion during the visit of President Obasanjo of Nigeria
. Her Maj and His Presidentship were in an open carriage being transported to St Pauls for a sing song of a Sunday evening when one of the horses directly in front of the President let rip with a huge rasping fart.

An embarassed silence ensued until The Queen suddenly cleared her throat and turning to the President said "I am most terribly sorry President Obasanjo".

The President, diplomatic to the end replied "Thats quite alright your Majesty, to be perfectly honest I thought the horse had done it"



I still like the old ones.

How much do farts weigh anyway, if I go for a walk and get rid of some juicy ones will it make a difference on the scales ?

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