Monday, July 10, 2006

Your last supplier was crap

I don't like motor insurance companies.

You may have gathered that I don't like motor insurance companies if you have read this blog through June.

Unfortunately, because I have three cars to personally insure in the business then I have to deal with them from time to time, and occasionally I take the bit between the teeth and I shop around using this t'interweb thingy to find a better price than the one that my current provider promises me is definitely the cheapest after they've searched an searched for a better price for me.

Strangely enough, year on year, when they search and search for me they always come up with one thats slighty more expensive than last years premium, whereas when I search and search I can always find one thats cheaper.

It happened last month, Budget Insurance got a strop on with me after direct debits missed payment for two of the policies, (I accidently cancelled one of them - tee-hee) they sent a standard letter stating that they'd cancel both policies if I didn't buck my ideas up.

So I went shopping with a "fuck you Budget" attitude.

One of the cars ended up at Admiral Insurance, home of the most annoying fuckin advert on TV involving Harry Enfield doing a parrot voiceover, absolutely appalling, I almost refused on the principal that any executive who passed that idea as being a good marketing campaign needs his fuckin bumps feeling, but still, they were the cheapest by a long way, so they got the business.

The other car ended up back at Budget.

Yes thats right, just two months earlier Budget had promised me that they had searched and searched and searched for the cheapest ever, ever, ever policy and cross their hearts and hope to die they'd found it for me. Just eight weeks later I found a cheaper one - on their own fuckin web site, the twats.

So I signed up for it and when they asked for proof of the no claims bonus I put a copy of their own letter from eight weeks ago which showed the no claims bonus, in the envelope and sent it back to them.

They wrote to us today.

It was their stroppy letter again.

The one that said I was a bastard for not sending all the details that they'd requested and that they were stomping their feet again and cancelling the new insurance, because they could, so there. And I had to send all of the documents and the insurance certificate back or I would be a very naughty customer and they'd set the bobbys on me.

I rang them in "don't say much make them squirm" mode.

Asked the lady which policy it was that they were going to cancel

She confirmed it was the new one.

Asked why.

She told me that the no claims bonus confirmation that I'd sent back was not good enough proof for them and then she asked the golden question, the one that had me smirking and trying to hold back the gales of laughter - she asked me who it was that had issued that previous proof of no claims.

"It was you"


"It was Budget Insurance"

"Was it ?"

"Yes, and it was your office"

She looked again at the copy I'd sent and then I heard her mumble to herself "Oh shit"

She didn't cancel the new policy after all.

I bet that ruined her Monday morning, it certainly made mine start nicely.

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